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Memories of Clayesmore by the First Girls' House Tutor
About four lives ago, in 1977, I took up my first teaching post at Clayesmore School. I was to teach History, English, French and General Studies, be responsible for all the Drama (with a big rather than a small d!) and be a house tutor to the expanding girls' house, Bower. This meant, as I was to learn, enforcing the "six inch rule" (the rule against intimate physical contact between the girls and boys) and smoking out the smokers."Green Crystals" (John Skinner) was much better at this than I. He was reputed to have laid down on the floor of his House's attic, frequented by smokers, a kind of crystal that would stain green anyone who came into contact with it. I can remember him searching the bushes for miscreants at night, wearing a dark green anorak and equipped with a large torch. I learnt a lot from him about interrogation techniques, too (keep suspects separate, closely cross-examine one by one and then sift through notes for inconsistencies).
My only detection coup was achieved by accident. One night towards the end of term some boys climbed into one of the girls' dormitories at the far end of the building. My room was at the other end and I slept through the entire incident! A more vigilant matron in the Lower School on the floor above, however, was woken by the noise, and it was my task to investigate. I sat in my room with one of the culprits, wondering what questions I should ask her. Luckily, she was so unnerved by my silence that she spilled out the whole story.
The girls really came into their own when it came to school plays, though. The Tilden family (Amanda and Jo) was an excellent source of acting talent - taking after Dad, of course. Karen Ripper - now married to a one-time lighting manager, Willie Perks - was another star. Ruth Dear made beautifully designed and perfectly finished costumes for my two main productions, The Importance of Being Earnest and Thunder (a play about the Brontes); I was very pleased to be allowed to give the costumes for the former a second showing when I directed it as a staff play at my next school, Dulwich College.
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| The Importance of Being Earnest - 1978 |
The girls also shone at musical activities - which could be a cause of conflict with Nick Zelle when play rehearsals clashed with Orchestra or Choir! I once accompanied them on a concert expedition to the Bournemouth Winter Gardens that turned out to be the occasion for one of the most embarrassing moments of my teaching career: needing a pre-concert pee, I dashed into the nearest loo - and exited in a state of confusion, watched by the entire party who were standing outside the gents. Nick, of course, delighted in regaling the entire staff with the tale.
I wish Robert Mash a very happy retirement. I remember him as a source of very entertaining dry comments, such as his "meals on keels" joke after the floods, and his sotto voce response to a complaint in a staff meeting by a teacher that too many pupils chose to have their music lesson during his classes: "It's not a problem with the more popular subjects...."!
Finally, another moment that has stayed in my mind: Mr McIsaac announcing to the whole school after lunch that "The results of the girls' Bristols (the name of a careers test) will be available in the Library this afternoon" ("Did I say something funny, Mike?").
Elizabeth Coatman (Gay Arden)
56 Marsh House Road
Sheffield S11 9SP
0114 236 2722
